This here is Autumn Z with your women health minute. Girrrl make your mens leave the room and I'm a tell you sumpin about it.The few days before that most special time of the month or in my case, whatever random time it happens to be, I get hateful, but not to those I love. I am anti ME at this time. I feel stupid and ugly and untalented and ugly haired and so bloated and flabby that I don't think I should be aloud to live. I went and burrowed my head into my pillow and Chris came and laid down beside me. He is used to this and is good at deciding how best to handle me. Here is the conversation:
C:Poor baby. What can I do?
Me: Don't rub my belly. It's gross.
So he started to rub my hair
Me: Don't rub my hair either. It's stiff and coarse with wierdo sections flying about at random.
He then did the absolute best thing he could do. He laughed until I was ready to slap him. I kept asking him "what?" in between my own reluctant giggles and would hear things like "so sorry" and "hair" and "witch". Finally he was coherent enough to say
"Witch Hazel. You feel like you look like Witch Hazel!"
Naturally I then gave a huge laugh from my big bloated flabby belly, scrubbed my hands through my snarled frizzy hair and we had to get up and go watch some Witch Hazel on You Tube. Enjoy A Witch's Tangled Hare. If you need another fix, here's Broomstick Bunny.
3 comments:
I have not seen those in at least 15 years!!!! Thank you, and thank your hubbun too from me! I will now pass on these gems to my eldest son who has an appropriate appreciation for the WB cartoons. As for your hair, my favorite remark of yours was the Rosanna rosanna-danna on crack one. I STILL laugh when I think of it... Of course, the "naturally curly hair" cracks me up too.... You do have very pretty hair, always have had, and it is hilarious that Chris thinks sooooooooo much like you that he knew what you felt like before you knew how to describe it :D
I ADORED Witch Hazel!!! Thanks for the memories! :)
I totally get it AZ. Today I couldn't take it anymore. I went and had my hair cut and eyebrows done. I really couldn't afford it, have been off on medical leave with no pay for a month, but I couldn't stand it any longer. If I had to go one more day looking at all the over grown hair, I'd have had to find a hat that came down to my nose.
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