Reflections on 15 Years of Marriage

Today is our anniversary. We were talking last night about what all has changed in the 15 years since January 27, 1994. What if we could have looked into the future and had seen our selves at this very moment in time?

Firstly, we would have been amazed that we had these two great children and it would blow our minds to see them. 15 years ago, we weren't sure we even wanted children, and never could have imagined having two other people living with us! A dog, yes, but an 11 year old girl and a boy who will be 9 in a week? No way.

We would have liked how cute our home was, but would have run screaming had we known we would live in rural Alabama. That was so not in our game plan.

If we could have seen that Chris was a Respiratory Therapist who intubated people and saved lives on a regular basis, we would not have given that vision any credence whatsoever.

We would be happy that we were still involved in music, and I would be shocked to know that I played the harp, as that had never even crossed my mind at the time.

It would surprise me that I considered myself to be a pagan, since I didn't even know what that was in 1994. We would be quite curious about the fact that Chris was reading the Tao Te Ching and that I was reading a book with the word "witchery" in the title.

My brother was 16 when Chris and I married, and had only recently told me he was gay (to which I said "duh"). My parents were only 40 years old, and Chris' dad was still alive.

We would not be surprised that we still had so much fun together, but we would be very disappointed that we didn't have any more time alone together than we do. Chris would be freaked out by all his gray hair, and I would wonder about all the lines on my face.

All in all, we decided that if we were exactly what we expected we'd be, it would have been a disappointment, as that would mean we hadn't grown as individuals or in our partnership.